yo la estoy viendo ahora mismo
I’m loving this week’s Mou-Cris-Sergio combo on Crackòvia!
Mou: Fantastic, phenomenal, almost as good as me! Fernando Alonso, what a surprise! I read an interview that said that your father never hugged you. And now you came for a hug, correct?
Fernando Alonso: Yes.
Mou: But today is Saturday, and you’re not going to win until tomorrow in Korea. Get out of here! Let your father give you a hug! Out!
Cristiano: Well well well… I want four hugs, one for each wonderful goal that I scored. Come on. One, two, careful with the eyebrows, three, four. Happy with the 4-1 result, míster?
Mou: What do you mean, 4-1? It’s 6-1.
Cristiano: What are you talking about, 6-1? Who scored the other two goals? Why didn’t you all pass to me? Egoists! Useless people!
Sergio: What’s up? I had a great time in the palco.
Cristiano: Watching me score four great goals, of course.
Sergio: Whatever, I was watching a movie on my phone, one that Guti recommended: Dumb and Dumber. Have you all seen it?
Mou: I’m watching it right now.
Sergio: Ahhhh, I know where you’re going with that. It’s just that my profile looks a bit like [something].
Cristiano: Ehh, ehh, I’m here. Has anyone else ever scored four goals in one game? No. So let’s talk about me.
Sergio: Well, the Internet says that Messi scored four against Arsenal in the quarterfinals of the Champions League.
Mou: You deserve that, for being egocentric. What does your little machine say about the crack who coaches the highest scoring team in the championship in the last few years?
Sergio: Let’s see… Guardiola. We have 22 goals in eight games, and Barcelona had 23 at this point last year.
Mou: What? Well yes, we’re the only ones who have scored four goals.
Sergio: The same as Barça, take a look.
Cristiano: And who has taken more corners?
Sergio: Madrid 34, Barça 38.
Mou: And who has hit the post more?
Sergio: Madrid 6, Villa 215 [jajajaja!!!]
Cristiano: And who has the best looking players in the world?
Sergio: Barcelona without Ronaldinho, and us with Özil… so Barça as well.
Mou: And who has the bigger field?
Mou: And who…
(repeats several times)
Sergio: It still says Barça!
Cristiano: Does it say anything about me?