de la Guti cueva… ¡es como la cueva de Batman!
No Cristiano this week in Crackòvia, but Guti makes a reappearance in the Madrid locker room! This of course, leads to hilarity.
Mou: I had told the president that we were going to win today in his stadium.
“Memut”: I didn’t know that the stadium of Hércules belonged to President Florentino.
Mou: Isn’t it clear, Memut? It’s the stadium of Rico Pérez! (Hércules’ stadium is called the (José) Rico Pérez, but “rico Pérez” also means “rich Pérez” as in rich Florentino Pérez).
Everyone: Hahaha!
Mou: In addition to being the best coach in the world, I’m also the best comedian in the world.
Memut: But today’s game was difficult, míster! We had to make a comeback from one goal down.
Mou: It was to make things exciting! If we always win 6-1, it’ll be very boring, Özil! All right everyone, go change, it’s time to go to Milan and beat that group of retirees! Let’s go! Come on!
(music starts playing)
Memut: Míster! I hear music!
Mou: It’s true. Where’s it coming from?
(the “scan mode” of Özil recognizes José Mourinho, and then detects an object with an unknown source of sound.)
Memut: It’s coming from here.
Guti: Weah! What’s up, paletos?
Mou: But where did you come from?
Guti: From where else? The Guti cave.
Mou: The Guti what?
Guti: The Guti cave. It’s like the Batcave. I put a locker in the locker room of Beşiktaş and I can come out in any locker in Spain, freshly showered and nicely dressed. Do you love it, or don’t you love it?
Mou: But why have you come?
Guti: To celebrate!
Memut: Ahh, of course, to celebrate the victory of Real Madrid!
Guti: Hahaha!!! What are you saying, membrillo? To celebrate that tomorrow yours truly turns 34! Weah!
Memut: (in German) One, two, three, four…
Guti: What are you doing, nene??
Memut: I’m half Turkish, you live in Turkey… in Turkey, there is the tradition that when someone celebrates a birthday, you pull on their ear.
Guti: Do you want me to pull on something else, or what? Anyway, listen, I invite you all to have a few drinks, who’s in?
Memut: I like parties!
Guti: Well that’s obvious, what eyes you have! How do you turn them like that? Weah! How great is that? Well, today we’re going to have fun. And there’s even the change in time tonight, which means we have one more hour to move our skeletons! Pim pam, pim pam… femur viene, femur va… Let’s go!
Mou: But Memut, where are you going?
Memut: To the party! Torre rosa, shots… Olé, olé!
Guti: I’m leaving. Batman…
Mou: Wait!!
I loved this! Thanks for the translation. I don’t understand a word of what’s being said, but still find it hilarious! The strangest part is that the other day, I found myself going ‘pim pam, pim pam’ while talking to a friend! LOL!
Love crackovia.
But if only this ozil as cute as the real ozil..
I love CR crackovia. Not only funny but good looking too 😉
My fav crackovia is still CR musical performance i must have watch it 100 times and still find it funny. lol
Share a link on here to the music one! i want to see it!!
CR musical performance?? Give me the link, please!
RIGHT? ozil is not ugly in fact i kinda like his big eyes lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Icr0dwVmrDA are you refering to this? i like it too a lot…
do you know which song they have altered?
It’s from the movie Grease-John Travolta sang the original.
Crackovia will not let Guti go peacefully, will they? I love it! We benefit from their obsession with the man. Thanx, Crackovia, from the bottom of our hearts.
I agree with u sweetubi:):):).I wonder if the players see crackovia and if yes what do they think about it?I love Cr crackovia he is so hilarious lol
Jaja, bendito Crackovia Guti, cubatas y chupitos 🙂 !! (El abuso de alcohol es peligroso para la salud)
Omg, GUTI HAS HIS OWN SET OF VANISHING CABINETS. (Any other Potter fans here? Statistically there must be!) What genius!
What is the torre rosa that Memut refers to? Google gave me:
– A hotel in the Vatican
– A cocktail bar in Barcelona
– Gaudi’s house in Parc Guell
None of those seem to quite fit the context!