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¡hola amigo invisible!

December 21, 2010

I love Crackòvia and I think the program is genius and hilarious, but they really do need to get a new angle with Real Madrid.  The arrogant Mou quoting his press conferences, dumb Sergio and vain Cristiano are getting a bit tedious.  It’s the same week after week, just repackaged for the latest happenings in Madrid.  With that said, this week’s skit is quite funny.

SR:  (imitating José Mourinho) Yesterday we beat Sevilla with 10 men and today we have this great Christmas dinner.

JM:  None of that.  They gave me a list of 13 grave errors.  The shrimps are frozen.  The champagne is hot.  The chef didn’t advise me of… you want more?

CR:  Oh, you’re always the one defending us, míster.  I’d give you a ten.

JM:  A ten?

CR:  An eleven?

JM:  That’s much better.  Then they’re going to say that this year we didn’t win anything.  Well, with this dinner, I’ve gained (same word for win and gain in Spanish) four kilos.

SR:  (imitating Mou).

JM:  What happened to your mouth?  Why are you full of it?

CR:  Everyone, it’s time for the Secret Santa gifts!  Let’s go, everyone get together to open them!

Ok, I’ll do it alone, like during the games.

Oh, it’s for me.  What a coincidence.  Oh.  But didn’t we agree that we wouldn’t spend more than €100,000 for the gifts?  Who was it?  Idiots.  It was me.

JM:  Come on, let’s open the rest of the gifts.  Look, this one’s for Sergio.

SR:  Ahhh, for Sergio Ramos.  And I am José Mourinho.

CR:  Why are you so obsessed with the míster?  No matter how much you imitate him, he’s not going to listen to you.  Idiot.

SR:  It’s just that the paper I got had “Mourinho” on it.  And I have to imitate him throughout the entire dinner.

CR:  No, you have to buy him a gift.  That’s what Secret Santa is about.

SR:  ¿Amigo invisible?  ¡Amigo invisible!  ¡Hola amigo invisible! (Secret Santa in Spanish is amigo invisible, literally “invisible friend.”)  You’re looking much better now.

CR:  But then… if you didn’t get the míster a gift…

JM:  THERE’S NO PRESENT FOR ME!

Everyone is punished!  You’ll train on Christmas day and go two months without playing!

CR:  But if we’re not going to play, who will play, míster?

JM:  The boys of the cantera.  Come on!

CR:  Idiots.

SR:  Ahhh, those are the invisible friends.  Now I understand everything.  But… if they’re invisible, how come I can see them?  What vicissitudes Christmas has, no?

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13 Comments leave one →
  1. Deb permalink
    December 21, 2010 22:01

    yeah, why do they always portray Sergio as dumb? I don’t get that impression from him at all.

  2. Lissete permalink
    December 22, 2010 00:11

    This was hilarious! I love these skits, they’re so funny! There’s something I’m a bit confused about in the Spanish spoken here. A word that the Cristiano character uses a lot for “idiots” sounds like “baratos.” Is this correct? I might have spelled it wrong or I’m hearing it wrong. Whenever I hear the word “barato” it means “cheap.” So when I hear the plural of it, it sounds like he’s saying “cheapstakes.” or something like that. I don’t know maybe it’s a cultural thing and it’s used differently in Spain or maybe I’m hearing the word wrong. Any help here for someone learning Spanish?

    • December 22, 2010 08:25

      It is “baratos” but I just translate a lot of things as idiot since they’re much more colorful in Spanish.

  3. Hala_Madrid permalink
    December 22, 2010 02:26

    I’m not going to lie. I do like watching Crackovia, but i have always disliked the way Sergio Ramos and Cristiano are portrayed. But what else can we expect this is a cule show.

    • Kate permalink
      December 24, 2010 01:03

      There is (or rather, was, they stopped filming it) a Telemadrid version of Crackovia which from what I’ve seen is pretty madridista, if you’re interested

  4. December 22, 2010 05:18

    Why does their Spanish sound so weird?

    • Michelle permalink
      December 22, 2010 18:11

      The Portuguese accents? *shrug*

    • blitzen permalink
      December 23, 2010 02:45

      Because the actors are Catalan!

    • blitzen permalink
      December 23, 2010 02:46

      And in most of this skit they are imitating a Portuguese accent (because Mou & CRonaldo are Portuguese).

  5. December 22, 2010 12:26

    I have seen enough of dumb Sergio…
    OK, I have to confess it is funny, but at the same time I have the feeling he gets more dumb in every new episode.:(

  6. Alex permalink
    December 23, 2010 00:56

    Really, that wasn’t funny. Some of the episodes has been great but this one was just.. meh.

    Special 1 TV Christmas episodes beats it http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-piBR9VZTAc

    • RealLisa permalink
      December 23, 2010 15:58

      Omg thanks, that was hilarious!

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