yo soy Esteban Granero…

The “tomas falsas” video is out (yay!), and it can be used as evidence (the kind that can hold up in court) that this really is the most adorable team ever, full of characters (and only on par with La Roja, in my opinion).  Plus, they all have the most adorable laughs, no?

Here are my highlights (as you can see, it’s basically the entire video); what are yours?

0:04 – the person off camera says, “Pepe, no improvising, we’re just going to wish all the madridistas a happy holidays.”  Marcelo and Pepe respond, “we’re going to  be here all afternoon.”  According to the web site, Pepe also said, “it’s impossible to do it well with Marcelo.”  It took more than five minutes for them to do their part, as we can see from the multiple outtakes we have of this fantastic duo – half of the video is of them!  Marcelo and Pepe really need their own show, along with Cris, and with the rest of the team making guest appearances.

0:41 – Gonzalo kicks things off with a “vamos Ricky.”  Kaká says, “this is an example – a Brazilian and an Argentine sending out Christmas wishes.  It’s a union.”  Pipa echoes, “union.  This is una familia.  Una flia.  Una flia.”

0:58 – Marcelo asks where Crís is!

1:08 – Pepe singing (apparently the only song he knows).

1:33 – Mesut uses a falsetto voice to say his line, while Sami says let’s be serious.

1:58 – Pepe: “it’s impossible to do.”

2:04 – Álvaro’s take on a Christmas classic.  I love it!

2:21 – Marcelo’s serious face.

2:27 – José Callejón: “you’re going to talk about dreams?  Then I’ll remove that from my vocabulary.”

2:36 – Pipa: “I want to report that I’m with Ricardo Kaká, and I am Esteban Granero (again)!”

3:05 – after having corrected Fábio earlier, Cris now laughs at his pronunciation attempts, which causes Fábio to crack up.

3:12 – Marcelo gets excited that next year is 2012 – “it’s my year!” (because of the 12).  Pepe complains about having to do more takes.

3:31 – Xabi: “… and then I come in.”  Sergio: “hey coño, give me a bit of room to maneuver.”  Then they argue over who gets to talk about the new year.

3:43 – Silvino conducts Ricky and Gonzalo.  Pipita doesn’t know the words because Ricky sings “Jingle Bells” in English, so he kind of na na nas his way through.

4:05 – Pepe bursts into song again.

4:13 – Callejón: “Tom Cruise called me to do a movie.”  Antonio: “Tom Cruise?  The director would call you, not the actor.”  Jajajajajajaja!!!!!!!

4:21 – the twins argue over who starts.

AA – do you want me to start?  Do you know yet?

RA – no, but you start.

AA – it’s better that I start.  It’s all the same to me.  Do you know what I’m going to say?

RA – no.

RA – no, I’ll start.

AA – fine, you start.

RA – no, you start, you start.

AA – (words, lots and lots of them…………………………………………………………………………….)

RA – Merry Christmas.

5:21 – Pepe: “you speak, then I speak, and then we say together, ‘happy holidays to all of el madridismo.'”  Marcelo: “together?”  Pepe: “together.”

I’m surprised there was no Iker and Esteban, despite Iker’s superlong monologue.  He didn’t mess up once?  So he is perfect!

The web site also reports that José Callejón was behind the cameraperson when the French players were filming their part to mess with them, and that he teased Karim Benzema about his white jacket.  I have to say that I absolutely ADORE the addition of José Callejón to this team.

Luckily, that really annoying intro is missing, though we do get another super-long one (which was removed from the version posted on youtube).  I could also do without the fake snow, and I wish the outtakes had filled the entire screen and didn’t require you to crane your neck to watch it.  Seriously, is the video department at Real Madrid made of amateurs?  So much fantastic material to work with, yet they make each experience somewhat painful.

And be sure to check out the Castilla video for some singing of villancicos, and Álvaro López doing his message in English!

The first team should have released another video in which they all spoke their native languages, no?